Daniel Driscoll: Army's Future and... What's ATF Got To Do With It?

[Generated Title]: Dan Driscoll's War Games: Or, How to Sound Important Without Saying Anything

Okay, so the U.S. Army Secretary, Dan Driscoll, is flapping his gums to the Wall Street Journal about preparing for future wars. Right. Like we haven't heard that one before.

Is anyone actually surprised?

The Usual Song and Dance

Seriously, this is the same tired script they've been reading from for decades. "We gotta be ready! The future is uncertain! Blah blah blah." It's like watching a rerun of a show you've already seen a million times. And let's be real, half the time these "preparations" just mean lining the pockets of defense contractors.

I mean, what else is he supposed to say? "Nah, we're good. No wars on the horizon. Everyone can just chill?" Give me a break. His job is to justify the Army's existence, and fear is a hell of a motivator.

Here's the thing, though: what kind of wars are we talking about? Are we prepping for another ground war in the Middle East? A cyberwar with Russia? A full-blown conflict with China? Driscoll's being conveniently vague, which makes me think even he doesn't know. Or worse, he does know, and he's not telling us because it would scare the living daylights out of everyone.

And while we're on the subject of things that scare me...

My Annoying Neighbor's Leaf Blower

Speaking of noise, my neighbor's been using his leaf blower at 7 AM every freakin' Saturday for the past month. I swear, if I hear that thing one more time, I'm gonna... well, let's just say it won't be pretty. This is totally unrelated, offcourse, but the sheer bureaucratic incompetence of the Army somehow reminds me of the sheer inconsiderateness of that guy.

But back to Driscoll. He’s talking about, you know, the Army needing to be "agile" and "adaptable." These are just buzzwords, people. Empty suits love buzzwords. It's like they went to a seminar on "How to Sound Important 101" and just regurgitated the entire PowerPoint presentation.

What does "agile" even mean in the context of the U.S. Army? Does it mean they're gonna start doing yoga and meditation? Or are they just gonna buy a bunch of new gadgets that will be obsolete in five years?

The Void Where Details Should Be

The article, predictably, is light on specifics. We get a lot of tough talk about "modernization" and "innovation," but very little about, like, actual plans. It's all smoke and mirrors, designed to make us feel safe and secure without actually doing anything concrete. As Driscoll said in a recent interview, the Army is in a "race to equip the military for future wars" Army Sec. Daniel Driscoll on the Race to Equip the Military For Future Wars - Yahoo Finance.

Maybe I'm being too cynical. Maybe Driscoll really does have a brilliant plan for the future of warfare. Maybe he's just waiting for the right moment to unveil it. Then again, maybe I'll win the lottery tomorrow. The odds are probably about the same.

Just Another Day at the Propaganda Mill